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I have always loved being a girl. It is fun to dress up and feel a fullness in physical beauty. It is equally fun to be tough and play in the mud and throw a baseball REALLY hard. I like my options. I like that I can be me in many categories. But somewhere along the way I started feeling less-than the boys. I wanted to be one of the guys; I wanted to hang out with my brothers friends; I wanted to have a front row seat to the mischief and adventure.

As I grew older, I wanted the freedom that guys seemed to always have (I'm not a dude, so I don't really know how they feel about themselves). I didn't date anyone because I didn't want to get married. I think somewhere in my gut I thought that if I "belonged" to a man in any form of relationship that he would be above me. I didn't know these were my beliefs when I did get married, but I shifted when the title "wife" became mine. I did what I didn't want to do. I put myself down. I thought I was s…

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